This saying is so familiar to us & quoted ad-lib over the years to try & motivate others to help; usually within the family setting.
There is a lot of truth in it & we could add a modern day twist, many hands make work fun! When we work together as a family we find a greater sense of achievement & accomplishment than when we leave everything to just one person, usually Mum or Dad! Running a household, whether in a bedsit or large family home, is still a difficult task. This is an area where those in third world countries so often put us to shame. If we ask our children to wash the dishes they may well complain because we are interrupting their WII game or other activity, yet a child in Africa who doesn’t know about these self absorbing activities, might walk miles to carry water home from a well so that dishes may be washed. The sad thing is that we seem to have lost our way & so often end up cutting our family bonds which is clearly evident in many places, so who are the poorest? Richness of spirit is the answer we will find within a religious context.
When we watch programmes designed to help families who are warring with each other due to extremely ‘difficult’ children, we are so often re-united with the power & joy a traditional family unit incorporates. Businessmen who take time to play football with their children at the weekend after years of focusing on their work pretty much 24/7 suddenly realize what fun life with their children & partner can be. These programmes usually include a fair distribution of labour according to the ages of family members and previously stubborn children actually accept the new programme after an initial showdown. This re-enforces a child’s need to be part of the pack and their underlying desire to contribute within their own family; it actually adds ‘value’ to their existence & teaches them that they are important, valuable people in their own right. Sometimes I think that we parents have learnt to over-burden ourselves with a false sense of guilt regarding our children’s wants & needs, removing their responsibility as a way of showing our love which is actually inappropriate.
ADULTS LOSE THE FUN FACTOR!! A sad development caused by increased demands at work, having to network continually both on & off the internet, meeting deadlines & all the rest that goes with today’s work environment. Balance in life is essential and so often when it goes wrong it is the family that suffers. Instead of children cementing a loving relationship through building on the foundations of family life, our concentration & focus is sidetracked. Instead of building a powerhouse of family memories we have a unit of individuals struggling to get along together. Even family holidays are not necessarily an opportunity to, ’get away from it all.’ On-line is always open with our laptops & smart phones, no peace for the wicked! How upsetting when the children are excited about going to the beach & a little business means that everyone has to wait or go on ahead.
Memories are precious and we may not realize how time is passing us by. If you don’t get into the ‘family mode’ you may ultimately lose your family as bitterness and upset will set in. Sharing is love, helping is love, being together is love. These cannot be replaced lightly, so make sure everyone in your home has a job to do and once the work is done it’s time for the fun to begin. Rewards are simply recognition for a job well done & can be as simple as a story, dancing in the front room, playing a game together or anything age appropriate.
Finally, through working together you are putting the needs of everyone above the needs of the individual & helping your children to acquire a less selfish & willing attitude whilst learning basic skills such as co-operation, teamwork, good communication & most of all how to value themselves which creates great self esteem.
Taking this to the optimum point; many hands make happier families & that’s BRAAP!
& now the age old story!!
The king had issued an order. It was meant to be obeyed by Everybody. From king's point of view it was an important job to be done. Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realised that Everybody wouldn't do it.
Jaz McKenzie
Does you family have a great story to tell? If so contact us itsbraap@live.co.uk
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