Sunday, 29 January 2012

Jealousy~ Taming the Yellow-Eyed Monster! Live Life~Love Life Wk 6



Understanding and over-coming jealousy

Jealousy: such a strong powerful emotion, an emotion that can be very hard to control and can often end with dangerous consequences. So how do feelings of jealousy occur? I believe jealousy occurs when individuals are dissatisfied with themselves & their lifestyle, so they begin to compare themselves to other people, their lifestyles, accomplishments, assets and more!

I like to think of myself as a realist. I appreciate it sounds great to suggest fighting jealousy with gratitude, for example, “Don’t dwell on what you do not have, just count your blessings!” but in reality is this easy to do? Instead of suggesting envy is shameful & that we should fight it by acknowledging that we are already privileged, I have a few suggestions to channel jealousy into growth and personal gain.

The aspirations and achievements of others that we tend to envy can be turned right around into achieving our own personal goals in life. If we can learn to appreciate others achievements and learn from them we can gain a lot of inspiration that in turn benefits us. We should encourage others and congratulate individuals on their success; this is one of the many steps that can help to neutralise those feeling of jealousy in order to become more humble and calm the yellow eyed monster!

Jealousy can be influential in many areas of life. Ever seen your boyfriend/girlfriend talk to the opposite sex? Made you want to rip their head off right there and then? (yes I'm a teenager!) You wonder how you can control these emotions; the good news is you can! In order to overcome jealousy you must firstly admit it is a problem and that will help you get over it. Once you have realised these factors and seriously considered them in relation to the main areas of jealousy in your life, you can begin your journey… when a feeling of jealousy occurs, breath in and out telling yourself that you can overcome these burning emotions. Once calmed down you can then gain a sense of perspective because jealousy blows everything out of proportion. Maybe you can find something to focus on for a little while before returning to consider the situation. By reflecting you may be better prepared to assess the event or decide on a sensible way to seek further information and have reasonable rather than accusing conversations with others..

There are two types of jealousy, rational jealousy that has some substance and irrational jealousy that is a feeling of rage without any real foundation, maybe caused by past experience. Whatever the cause, the best way to tackle it is to work hard at improving yourself; maybe you are not happy with regard to physical appearance, simply make the best of yourself, or feel you could do more in relation to career aspirations, again use your talents to the full.
Jealousy occurs in most people at different times in their lives and is more of a problem to some people than to others. The best thing is to recognize, acknowledge and move forwards. If not, you will remain stressed, upset and more often than not ashamed of your own emotions.

Jessica Lea

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