Tuesday, 8 April 2014

Have Questions~Have Answers? #12- Why do people have such unrealistic expectations?


Having watched quite a few property programmes over the weekend I have come to the conclusion that so many people remain picky and dissatisfied with life, holding out for unrealistic dreams.

One woman burst into tears when she was shown a modern home having requested original features, and this particular couple had already been looking for three years, finally contacting the programme in the belief that the presenters would magically conjour up the perfect property to meet all their demands despite their limited budget and the fact they couldn't agree in the first place!
The real question here is: ‘why are people’s expectations so unrealistic in the first place?’  I think that today people are given the impression that they deserve everything they desire regardless of circumstances- an idea constantly thrown at us via the media with advertising being hugely psychological, playing to our weaknesses.
Common sense dictates that if you have financial restrictions you should expect to make some compromises and this can be applied in different ways to meet our general expectations. What do we expect from our children or our partners?  Are our demands realistic when we look at their likes, dislikes, abilities or even earning potential? The point about expectation is that it sets a standard and in so doing sets us up for delight or disappointment. This can be avoided by applying a good dose of realism. Negotiation at the outset between parties helps create a sound platform in any situation. This does not mean that we shouldn’t expect the best however we may achieve it in stages rather than as a one off transaction. How much more do we appreciate the things we have had to work for? On the occasions when all the boxes are ticked we can enjoy extra feelings of amazement and gratitude.
I firmly believe in expecting what you want rather than wondering if you will ever come by it but sometimes it is good to leave a few blanks for the universe to fill. This can lead to more surprises and variety which enhances life.
The big question is~ how much are our expectations affected by greed? We should want things for the right reasons, not the wrong. I was stunned recently when I watched a quiz show in which the final two players can share or steal the winnings. One of the contestants went on about her dream board and how she would win- which she did. I was fully expecting her to share as she was tuned into the universe and presumably the 'fair' factor. I was shocked however when the other contestant decided to share and she decided to steal, walking away with all the money. I think she missed the point- and as she had effectively cheated him out of his half I expect the universe will take it back later! Greed is not to be applauded, especially when she would have had £9000 even if she had shared- not a nice person at face value.
Of course the most important aspects of live which we need to concern ourselves with are those emanating from within. We can have joy, peace and a cheerful disposition which will ultimately attract a whole range of good into our world and make life worth living. Life is not all about the perfect roof over your head, it is about striving for perfection within ourselves and in our dealings with others. Does it really matter how many bathrooms you have or whether you live by a main road? These are considerations that add a little something to the quality of our lives but are not really the best place to put all our energy. I certainly wouldn’t delay moving for 3 years  feeling miserable every day just to get perfection!

Jaz McKenzie

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Jaz McKenzie

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